My Gut Reaction: Too $hort - Born To Mack (Jive Records - July 20, 1987)

Let's pick up from where we were last off in the saga of Sir Too $hort.

Too $hort during the 1980s was just another faceless emcee from the West Coast who rapped the standard for a rapper during the 1980s; shit-talking, drugs, and pimping. Before 1986, Too $hort really wasn't particularly special. For the most part, he was just trying to make ends meet, living the grimy life of a street hustler on the mean streets of Oakland.

Then he started to cuss.

Remember that in the 1980s, it was very rare to hear a curse word even in a rap record. It was generally considered as taboo at the time, and not appropriate. But Too $hort didn't care. At the time, Too $hort saw his record purely as comedy; it was never intended to be taken seriously in any aspect, and was just good for some laughs. It was the 1980s equivalent of a YouTube Poop (god, I feel old), in that it was incoherent nonsense full of pop culture references that don't mesh.

But you see, Too $hort's records made strong waves. Throughout the Bay Area. LA. Texas. The Dirty South. It was being bootlegged because it was such an oddity. A rap record where someone cussed! Not even violent video games had cuss words. Truly, Too $hort hit the jackpot. Too $hort signed a deal with Jive, who loved cashing in on trends. Of course, this relationship would go sour, but this isn't the time to discuss that. Let's go on with our feature presentation.

Despite being brought up on Too $hort, I never listened to this; Get In Where You Fit In was standard issue (an album I've heard played to death long enough). It's production is very dusty for the younger millennial generation; most people are probably only familiar with the now (in)famous Freaky Tales, which, of course, inspired a number of other cuss words in other West Coast albums. And so, we commence.

1. PARTYTIME - Surprisingly enough, Too $hort hits us with a very radio friendly party single. The beat can be described as plodding; it's your typical 1980s beat with heavy drums and archaic Roland machine spins, so it's on par for the course. Short Dog's lyrics on the other hand, are clean as a whistle, mostly consisting of shit-talking and being a pick up artist. I assume $hort was looking for widespread airplay with this. Overall, not bad. I could see this being remixed into a modern trap hit and no one would notice.

2. MACK ATTACK - Holy shit. I have to admit. Despite being mostly 80s generic hip hop, the beat on here just slams. The bass really does bump, and it's incredibly catchy, showing that simplicity can still work effectively. $hort's lyrics aren't anything too special; he's mostly just doing slick talking to women with a little shit talking here and there. Surprisingly, Too $hort keeps it PG-13, but then again, this was 1987, so an entire album of cussing might not have sold well. If I wanted that, I'd have gone to a sporting event.

3. PLAYBOY $HORT II - The hotly anticipated sequel to the previous song on his third album, thankfully not made by Michael Bay. I have to say, so far, the bass just fucking knocks. It's smooth roll and strong hum makes an otherwise bland 80s beat that much more enjoyable. $hort's lyrics are everywhere; he mixes motivational messages, braggadocios, and sexual experiences all in the span of 7 minutes, yet only cusses twice, which is impressive for a notorious potty mouth. Not a bad song to be honest.

4. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN -Again, not bad. The instrumental's bass slams, but it slams in a more aggressive way, not to mention the use of the horn helps exemplify the loudness of the song. To think that this song would be remade into one of the biggest rap hits of the 90s (Gettin It) by Too $hort - the concept and even some of the lyrics are the same.

5. FREAKY TALES - Everyone knows this song. It's ironic that the dirtiest song on the entire LP is the one that got the most airplay, and even got this album to move units in the first place. The song's bass and drums would pretty much be sampled in 90s West Coast g funk songs to death. Yes, ground zero for G funk on this song.

6. DOPE FIEND BEAT - Holy shit. This song is even more dirtier than the previous song. I have to admit, the beat on here sounds funky as hell, despite the horrible lyrics. Seriously, the beat here is balls. Too $hort himself sounds like an angry farmer circa the 1880s yelling at the sky why it hasn't rained in a while.

7. LITTLE GIRLS - Too $hort dedicates this song to his favorite new wave band Oingo Boingo. No seriously, this song is pretty much a rip off of Oingo Boingo's infamous Little Girls. I imagine Pedobear himself bumps this in his lowrider, stuck in some parallel universe where the year is always 1988.

8. THE UNIVERSAL MIX - Just an instrumental. And with that, we're done with Born to Mack.

THE FINAL WORD - Surprisingly, this album didn't suck. I was expecting much worse to be honest; I was expecting generic misogynistic raps over generic 80s beats, though most of that is saved for the latter half of the album. I'll admit that overall, the sound of the album is pretty homogeneous and doesn't sound particularly good today, but the heavy use of funk bass would be detrimental to the sound of the West Coast, thus creating a drift between the two coasts. Too $hort's blunt sexist ranting opened the door for more cussing in hip hop, both allowing for more freedom of expression in the art form, yet also later bringing the industry down as a whole. What I'm saying is, this is a pretty important album.

BUY OR BURN? - I'm going with buy here. Yes, of course, the album hasn't aged very well, but it's far from horrible. It's pretty good. Born to Mack still holds a certain charm too it. Good crafting, Too $hort.

BEST TRACKS - Freaky Tales, Mack Attack, Dope Fiend Beat, Playboy $hort II

The Notorious B.I.G. - Ready to Die (Bad Boy - September 13, 1994)

Christopher George Latore Wallace, better known as The Notorious B.I.G., or Biggie Smalls, after his family won the rights to the name in a cock fight, is a now deceased emcee who originated from Bedford Stuyvesant in Brooklyn, New York. Biggie came from a very humble background of Jamaican immigrants trying to live the American Dream. Biggie lived in a very dangerous time and place, and his home situation wasn't better either. Smalls hated school but his mother bought junk food in order to keep him in school (seriously), but even despite his family's best efforts, by his late teen years he was slanging yay. Wallace looked like another statistic in the US ghettos.

Enter Puff Daddy.

In the early 90s in order to pass boredom in school Biggie began writing poems, lyrics, etc and started practicing his rapping. This was only on occasion though. However, good friend Puff Daddy realized Biggie had talent. By 1992 Smalls was practicing freestyles on the streets, and soon got a mainstream record deal. That record? The album above. It sold millions instantly, and shot Biggie into stardom among the many recognizable faces of hip hop by 1995. The rest is for another day, since this is only one part of the story. Now, with that out of the way, let's get on with the soup of the day.

1. INTRO - I don't care about any rap album intro, no matter the artist. It's still a pointless intro that's either some halfassed vent or more cliches. Sigh

2. THINGS DONE CHANGED - I'll be honest, I've never really liked this song so much. It's not bad, mind you, but I've heard better. Biggie manages to hold himself on a track that is pretty similar to Nas's NY State of Mind, but the beat isn't as memorable. Actually, I feel it's lacking. It sounds melodramatic, as if it sounds like it can't climax. A shame, I really liked Biggie's lyrics on here.

3. GIMMIE THE LOOT - A pretty classic track. The beat, courtesy of Easy Mo Bee, is pretty simple. It could've been better, but at least it's better than the previous track. Anyway, Biggie's storytelling of a contraband deal gone horribly wrong (sort of like Biggie's answer to Deep Cover) is just amazing. Biggie manages to smoothly get through the story while imitating a number of alter egos, but doesn't sound out of character. It goes to show how well Biggie was at his art.

4. MACHINE GUN FUNK - A pretty basic braggadocio song, of Biggie's boast and bullshit, as well as his love for the machine gun funk. This song is pretty good, but that's as much as I can say. It's pretty damn solid.

5. WARNING - I love this track. Like, I really love it. Smalls goes back to his usual strength of storytelling, this time rapping about being watched and paranoid without justified reason. Easy Mo Bee's beat is very atmospheric; it's quite slow and not over bearing, just slow smooth and moving like the drench of paranoia of this track. If only Biggie were around to rap about the National Security Agency.

6. READY TO DIE - Another paranoia track, but it's more of a catharsis if anything. Regardless, Biggie does a very good job of describing the daily troubles of a young black male in a ghetto. Seriously, this track is still pretty damn good to this day. Even if Easy Mo Bee's beat isn't as dramatic as I'd have preferred, it's still genius throughout.

7. ONE MORE CHANCE (ORIGINAL) - Where Biggie describes his various orgies and sex experiences. I'm not a huge fan of this one, even if Biggie's lyrics are quite good, especially for a topic most sound cheesy doing. Good job unleashing your inner Too $hort, Big!

8. FUCK ME - Fun fact - Lil Kim and Biggie actually had sex, and this was recorded. Otherwise, pointless.

9. THE WHAT (FT. METHOD MAN) - The only guest verse on Ready to Die (with the exception of a track that may or may not was supposed to be on here). It's a braggadocio, but a kickass one. Biggie holds his own against Wu member Method Man, and tear a pretty dope beat from Easy Mo Bee. Seriously, imagine if Biggie collaborated with the Wu. That could've fed children and shit.

10. JUICY - You know this one, needs no introduction. This probably plays on every 90s block everywhere. Interestingly enough, the original version, mixed by Pete Rock, was never sent; instead the remix (which is the album version) by Trackmasters was sent to publishing instead. The mistake was too little too late, and was released as a single, where the true original mix by Pete Rock was released as a B-side. The only real difference was a more boom bap drum set to the beat, but it's still ear pleasure, so I suggest you go find it.

11. EVERYDAY STRUGGLE - I like this song; Biggie's song is very quick and catchy. The beat, this time courtesy of the Bluez Brothers, knocks. Biggie's lyrics of everyday crime and struggle are entertaining. For song material that is usually depressing as hell, this song manages not to take itself too seriously, which is just awesome.

12. ME & MY BITCH - Romance tale. Not a fan of this one, sorry.

13. BIG POPPA - A blatant jack of the Isley Brother's In Between the Sheets. It's pretty much a remake, and a radio hit, and a G-funk copy, but I'm not a big fan of this one, it hasn't aged well. The Isley Brothers actually sued Bad Boy for unauthorized sampling, in 2004. 10 years after this song had made its mark widespread.

14. RESPECT - A boom bap copy beat which just sounds... strange. It's not the worst beat but man, it could've been a lot better, especially on top of an awful hook. Again, Biggie deserved a lot better than this.

15. FRIEND OF MINE - This beat was made in 1994? I have to admit this sounds quite ahead of its time. Hell, the beat could be remixed into a pulsating EDM beat, and no one would notice. Biggie's performance isn't too special, so this isn't something you'll be listening to every night.

16. UNBELIEVABLE - Now this is more like it. Seriously, I fucking love this track. DJ Premier plus Biggie is like almond butter on sourdough, its just amazing. The beat reminds me of laundromats, I have to admit. Nonetheless, this track is pretty damn awesome. Boom it in your headset, I tell you!

17. SUICIDAL THOUGHTS - Biggie's own catharsis on contemplating suicide. It's still a pretty dramatic track, if not creepy, especially given that Smalls died not too long after. It still sounds very strong, and is one of the best songs dealing with this subject. Biggie, you were the man for this one.

Hold your horses, we're not done yet.

B-SIDES TO TRACK DOWN.

18. WHO SHOT YA - Aka the song where Biggie supposedly reveals he organized the 2Pac shooting in 1994 even though in context doesn't sound so at all. All I know is that this track rocks. Nashiem Myrick's beat sounds so dark and menacing, like shit is about to go down. Biggie's lyrics don't fail, making this a must find.

19. ONE MORE CHANCE (REMIX) (FT. FAITH EVANS) - AKA the version played to death on radio. It's pretty incredible how Biggie could write about sex so well. He's better than that awful 50 Shades of Grey movie. Overall, if you need to listen to something while getting your club on, this isn't a bad song to turn to.

20. JUST PLAYING (DREAMS) - Re-released in 2004 in the remaster. It's a short and sweet one; Biggie pretty much fantasizes about exotic women he'll have sex with, again his inner Too $hort being seen here. It's not a bad track; it's like a 90s hip hop answer to all those terrible crush on a girl 2000s rock songs you probably played to death in high school.

21. RUNNIN' (FROM THA POLICE) (FEAT. 2PAC, DRAMACYDAL, BUJU BANTON & STRETCH) - I'm not sure if there is definitive proof this song was going to be on Ready to Die, but it was shelved from the original Thug Life album and never made it's way on 2Pac's Me Against the World, only being released on the 1995 compilation One Million Strong. Regardless, it's significant for being a living 2Pac-The Notorious B.I.G. collaboration, a pairing which had a whole lot of potential. It's bittersweet; Biggie and 2Pac both take the cake while Dramacydal hold their own. Easy Mo Bee's beat is dark, tragic, but kick ass.

And with that, we're done with Ready to Die. Huh.

FINAL WORD: Ready to Die is a classic. I'll admit, it's definitely not perfect; the production isn't 100% consistent throughout, and obviously some songs aren't great. But overall, Biggie delivered a very strong fucking debut. It's timeless, and it's definitely still worth listening today. You have to wonder the things Biggie might have accomplished. Then again, let's not kid ourselves. It probably would've involved the same bullshit trends that were inevitable. But Biggie's loss is still very much felt in 2016.

BUY OR BURN? - Buy, buy, buy. Simple. Don't make this difficult.

BEST TRACKS - "Unbelievable", "Juicy", "Gimmie the Loot", "Warning", "Ready to Die"

Twista - Resurrection (Unofficial Release, October 18, 1994)

In 1992 Twista was holding the world record of the fastest rapper, shortly after that, he released his first album Runnin' Off at da Mouth under the name of Tung Twista. Two years later and couple years before he appeared on Do Or Die's debut album and got really famous, he released his second album Resurrection. Unfortunately, it was never officially released, probably because a fellow Chicago rapper Common's album, which has the same title, was released around the same time. Some records were mostly sold in Chicago streets and in a few record shops.

1. DA RESURRECTION - This track starts with random creepy sounds, however they fit for the song. The beat is dope as fuck and scratching is actually used pretty amazingly, is it just me or does it sound like it's ahead of its time? You can tell Twista changed his style from the first album. His lyrics are raw and his flow is slower. It's actually a good intro for the album.

2. SUICIDE (REMIX) - Kinda unusual to have a remix before the original one on an album, I guess. But anyways, after Naughty by Nature said "Tung twist your ass back to Chicago", Twista had to respond with this diss track. No hate for Naughty by Nature but Twista pretty much destroys them. The beat isn't that great. Although I usually like the synthesizer, but for this track it doesn't fit that well.

3. ANOMOSITY KILLS - Yes, it is spelled like that. Twista has done what probably almost every 90s rapper has done, rapping about killing other rappers and how he is superior to them. The hook is kinda creepy with all that "whispering". The beat is dark and it has some weird horn sound, but it ain't a bad one.

4. STREET PARANOIA - Not a bad track. Twista rapping about struggle and life in the streets. The sad dark beat fits well for the atmosphere. Nuff said.

5. RE-ACT WITH A MIC - A track with Dres from Black Sheep. Pretty catchy hook. Dres and Twista are rapping about how they kill "punks" with their lyrics. I think the beat ain't anything special though, kinda boring. The song is alright.

6. SCAT LIKE DAT - So, Twista is doing scat singing, of course it ain't so easy to tell what he is saying. However, it's a good change from all this dark stuff. Jazzy beat with dope ass piano (or I assume it's piano). Really dope and catchy song! Twista returned back to his fast flow with this one.

7. RETURN - This track has been pressed on some single (Discogs claims it's a professional CD pressing) along with "Suicide". Apparently this one is some radio mix. On the single it's named "Return of da Rat-ta-tat". However, the beat is dope, it has that "night time in a ghetto" feeling. Why they sometimes get some Jamaican guy (or they say stuff in Jamaican accent) in a song about killing someone with a gun though? Like BDP's "9mm Goes Bang".

8. DIRT ON THE DOWN LOW - Amazing! Again, there's some jazzy horns, which sound dark, but the beat is dope, and the kinda silent synthesizer makes it fuckin' great. Twista's raw flow fits for this track pretty damn well.

9. SHADOW BOXIN - The title reminds me of Wu-Tang, actually the beat does too, I can hear Gravediggaz influence here. The bassline is amazing though. This is an okay track.

10. ALL ABOUT THE PAPES - Kinda chill jazzy beat, but it's a fuckin' good one. Nowhere has been mentioned who's the guy featuring. Anyways, a nice track about making that money. Twista's verses are dope.

11. ONE SHOT, ONE KILL - My favorite track. It features Speedknot Mobstaz and B-Hype. I ain't really familiar with Chicago scene, so I have no idea who these guys are. However the beat is dope as fuck, sounds really grimey and dark. I think this subject is already used pretty much on the album, but some rappers recycle their topics a lot. I always find this line funny: "Well, it's that miracle spiritual lyrical murderer".

12. SUICIDE - The original version. It has much better beat than in the remix. Also the most famous song off the album. It has been pressed on a single among the remix.

FINAL WORD: People say this is really underrated album, I definitely agree. Although he chaged his style, it  was still really different, if you compare to Adrenaline Rush, although he got more close to it with this album. He has more east coast kind of flow than that typical Chicago chopper flow in this album. However, really great album, one of the best by Twista.

BUY OR BURN? - If you ever have a chance, definitely buy this! It's a rare classic. However, if you ever see someone selling this, it's most likely just a shitty bootleg.

BEST TRACKS: "One Shot, One Kill", "All About The Papes", "Dirt On The Down Low","Scat Like Dat".

Cormega - The Realness (July 22, 2001 - Legal Hustle/LandSpeed Records)

Oh boy, where do we start here?

Cory McKay, better known as Cormega, is a rapper/emcee from the Queensbridge neighborhood of Queens, New York, and is one of many notable emcees to come from said area.

Cormega's career started as a mostly underground rapper coming out in the very late 80s and early 90s, though soon enough his promising career was cut short by a bid. He even received a shout out in 1994 on the album Illmatic on One Love, giving the man more fame than his music did at the time. After his bid ended in 1995, McKay was determined to better himself and pursue a career in rapping. Through his friend Nas, the man joined the Firm, alongside rookie Foxy Brown and promising sophomore AZ, with beats through Dr. Dre. He did well enough on the song Affirmative Action on It Was Written that he got a deal from Def Jam. Things looked rosy and beautiful.

Of course not.

Cormega had a falling out with Nas, or more specifically Steve Stoute, Nas' manager, under circumstances unclear (some cite creative differences; others Stoute preferring Nature or in-fighting). Regardless, it was ugly, and would start a beef between Nas and Cormega that would last for years. To make matters worse, more in-fighting at Def Jam lead to his original debut, The Testament, shelved indefinitely. He had some pretty unlucky years.

Eventually, after getting released from his lame duck contract at Def Jam, Cormega formed his own label (Legal Hustle) and began recording his new LP, The Realness. After already striking twice, you had to hope three was the charm. The Realness was released to genuine acclaim by critics, which of course meant no one bought it.

It's 2016, does this LP still hold strong?

1. DRAMATIC ENTRANCE - And we start off, and immediately we know Mega isn't fucking around. Cory's lyrics, which are mostly introspective and about his struggle in the music industry, and betrayal. I liked Cory's lyrics, they hit like bread and almond butter. J-Love's beat sounds very peaceful and eloquent, yet also has a very strong vibe, like this is the beginning, this is a statement. This wasn't long, but already Mega ships this home.

2. AMERICAN BEAUTY - A lot of bloggers and critics love this but honestly I'm not a fan of this track. Common had already done this before with "I Used to Love H.E.R.", so this feels like a rehash, even if McKay's lyrics towards hip hop are heart-felt. Mega's own beat is a bit plodding and honestly boring. Overall, a skipable track.

3. THUN & KICKO (FEAT. PRODIGY) - Now this is more like it. Both of our hosts, Prodigy and Mega, just freaking tear shit up here. Havoc's beat, while plodding, just knocks, since it moves slowly, it creeps, yet moves fast enough to get you both pumped. Both artist target different opponents; Prodigy with Jay-Z, while Cormega goes after Nas. Regardless, this stirred up a lot of beef with all camps, so it served its purpose. Awesome song!

4. THE SAGA - I was never a fan of this song either; the beat feels incomplete and just plods; it's a boring beat without much depth. That's not to detract from Mega's rhymes, which are rock-solid and describe a world of despair, sadness, and hopelessness. Mega deserved a lot better than this.

5. R U MY NIGGA - Like the previous beat on The Saga, Jae Supreme cooks up a beat which just lacks depth; it's not the worst beat I've heard, but it could've been a lot better. Of course, Cormega's rhymes are particularly strong here, discussing loyalty and trust. I like Mega's ironic lines "Only bitches deal with emotion, Yo son, how many snitches are still in the ocean, I'm gettin too deep, spittin unique". Also, really nice wordplay by Mega.

6. UNFORGIVEN - I actually really like this one. It's a short and sweet one, where Mega drops some good rhymes when it comes not just to betrayal, but also paranoia. Spank Brother's beat isn't the best, but sounds dramatic as fuck still, so overall this actually kicked ass.

7. FALLEN SOLDIERS - Fucking awesome. Mega's rhymes of deceased brethren are just heartfelt and straight forward throughout. Seriously, the dude raps with raw emotion, which, when done correctly, can conjure a fucking amazing track. J-Love gives us another banging beat, using Wet Willie's "Beggar's Song" to great effect. Seriously, if there were a list of best mourning tracks in rap, this is one of them.

8. GLORY DAYS - Another kickass song, this time Mega giving us a taste of memory lane as well as what it's like to reach the top, with some cynicism and caution mixed it. Jae Supreme's beat is as pleasant as honeydew here, creating a peaceful, yet almost mournful vibe for the listener. Also, is it just me, or is the bass to Guns n Roses Sweet Child o Mine used here? Probably not, but still, awesome.

9. RAP'S A HUSTLE - I guess this is sort of like a remake to American Beauty. I'll admit, Cory's first verse trying to compare stealing a girl (that's hip hop) to some dude's pen and pad is unintentionally hilarious. It reminds me of little kids playing with toys, as if they're living real things. His second verse comparing it to the drug trade hits on point though. I liked Ayatollah's soul-derived chipmunk beat; it sounds very nostalgic, peaceful, and even childish. This wasn't bad either.

10. GET OUT OF MY WAY - I thought this song was all right. Sha Money XL's beat is dramatic, but a bit too busy. Cormega shit talks and rips shit up, which works in this song's favor. Not the most memorable of songs though.

11. YOU DON'T WANT IT - Okay, this song is definitely about Nas. I thought that Godfather Don's beat was pretty decent, but like many beats on here, lacks that special edge... just doesn't feel complete. But Mega just tears shit up here, venting his frustrations towards Nas, even describing him as a brain surgeon.

12. 5 FOR 40 - If I wanted spoken poetry I'd go to a cafe, thanks.

13. THEY FORCED MY HAND (FEAT. TRAGEDY KHADAFI) - I really like Spunk Bigga's beat here; the beat here just smacks, with a good ol' chipmunk sample overlapping. The beat is perfect for both Mega and Tragedy just tearing shit to minces here. Lyrically instead of boasts and bullshit we get lyrics about overcoming the struggle, which again, are on point. Still a regular listen on my playlist.

14. FALLEN SOLDIERS (ALCHEMIST REMIX) - Eh, I still prefer the original, although Mega's new lyrics including a verse about his mother are strong.

15. KILLAZ THEME II (FEAT. MOBB DEEP) (HIDDEN) - This shit just knocks. Seriously, I love this track. Havoc's unorthodox but kick-ass sampling of the Twilight Zone theme is intimidating. Mobb Deep's boasts, alongside Cormega, just take this one home here.

B-SIDES/BOOTLEGS TO TRACK DOWN

NEVER PERSONAL (FEAT MIKE DELOREAN) - This was a track that somewhat leaked out to the media, but was mostly circulated around NY. This, unlike some previous tracks, is a full on attack on Nas, calling him from insults that range from a false gangbanger to a derogatory term for a homosexual. Nonetheless, Mega's rhymes are pretty awesome, over a banging 90s-style NY beat, even if Mike Delorean is a weed carrier you'll never hear from again.

FINAL WORD: The Realness is far from perfect. It's inconsistent, much of the beat selection is questionable, and there's a bit to be desired. Nonetheless, Cormega shows why he is one of the most highly regarded underground emcees out there, with absolutely raw emotion and lyrics. For an album that wasn't even meant to be a proper debut, this is pretty good. It's timeless, suffice to say.

BUY OR BURN? - I'd recommend a buy. There was a time where this was hard to come by, but it has been re-released multiple times. Support good, real hip hop.

BEST TRACKS - "Fallen Soldiers", "They Forced My Hand", "Thun & Kicko", "Glory Days". "Killaz Theme II"

Nelly - Country Grammar (2000 - Universal Records)

Oh boy, I might get a lot of hate for this one.

For those of you that don't know (those probably born when he cooled off; Jesus I feel old), Nelly was a huge thing in the early 2000s on this side of Eminem. Seriously, pretty much everyone knew who he was and listened to the man's music, whether it was your parents, your school teacher, your friends, or some middle aged dude trying to look hip and "in". I remember everyone had this album back in the day, myself included. He was to rap music at the time like Lionel Messi is to soccer right now, pretty much the most well known at the time. Hell, the dude beefed with KRS-One, a beef that, unfortunately to say, was mostly pointless, since most of Nelly's fanbase probably didn't know who KRS-one is.

Before 2000, Nelly, or Cornell Haynes, Jr, was pretty much unheard of at the time, and was mostly a faceless underground rapper from St. Louis, whose hip hop scene wasn't well known compared to grimy New York, or sunny California. Familial issues were the reason why he ended up there in the first place, and took up the pen and pad in 1993, over baseball (seriously). Throughout the 1990s he tried making various failed attempts at the mainstream via his weed carriers the St. Lunatics. After winning an apple bobbing contest, Nelly was chosen as the rapper to send random mixtapes to various recording companies, in hopes he'd get picked up.

Universal Records came calling.

Even with the new deal, it looked to be a disaster; Nelly was seen as a douche by his co-workers and even hated on his music; whether this was purely personal is not clear. Universal tried marketing him as the new kid who happened to be different, in a time where Puff Daddy and Master P were watering down the industry. Even then, it looked to be hopeless... then he blew up, because his music was so damn catchy. Given the quality of albums 1998-2000, it's not too surprising either.

It's been nearly two decades, and now Nelly just makes himself look like an idiot with the autotune and trap laced "The Fix" alongside Jeremih. Does this even hold up? Let's find out.

1. INTRO (FEAT. CEDRIC THE ENTERTAINER) - Wow, that was pointless.

2. ST. LOUIE - To start off proceedings, we begin with an instrumental that in all honestly, knocks. Jason "Jay E" Epperson's beat, which mostly consists of a disco-derived bassline as well as some use of a piano, is incredibly catchy, alongside Nelly's hook of St. Louis being home to gun violence, cocaine, blue collar workers and swingers. Nelly's lyrics, however, aren't nearly so; it's pretty apparent that he's simplistic at best. His flow isn't too bad, so honestly this song was all right, though I really couldn't tell if this was a street anthem or a club song, it seems to do both, but at the same time, neither.

3. GREED, HATE, ENVY - It looks like we're going into that territory already, eh? In an obvious attempt at extensive airplay, Nelly adopts a radio-friendly flow, rapping about what Eazy-E's merry weed carriers rapped about in 1995, jealousy, just packaged as "Greed, Hate & Envy". Nelly's pitch-high screeching is irritating as hell, so you can't even listen to the man's word without your eardrum being irritated; this song itself seems pretty ironic given Nelly's negative reputation with his labelmates, so maybe this was some ranting session. City Spud's beat is a Neptunes imitation, even jacking elements of Noreaga's "Superthug", which sampled elements of Blondie's "Heart of Glass". Even Noreaga himself is name-dropped here. Overall, this song was a mess. If this is indicative of the album, we have an issue here.

4. COUNTRY GRAMMAR (HOT SHIT) - You probably all know this one. The first single, this was quite a big song back then, and I bet the album sold based on this (and even more on another single we'll get to) song. For what it's worth, this song is actually catchy. Jay E's beat is very simplistic, if not monotonous, but doesn't suck. Haynes sounds at home over this beat though, as he rides this through with his Missouri twang-derived flow and shit-talking lyrics. Honestly, for a pop rap song, this could've been a lot worse. At least, Nelly actually raps, not the delirious bullshit that passes as "rapping" these days. Not bad.

5. STEAL THE SHOW (FEAT. THE ST. LUNATICS) - And pretty quickly we go back to music that can be at best described as mediocre. In the inevitable weed carrier track, the St. Lunatics pretty much rap about fame, fortune, and getting head, probably via Nelly. City Spud and Murphy Lee verses are purely about getting head, so honestly I'm surprised Too $hort didn't appear on this track, but then again he was stuck as a crony at Jive. Epperson's beat is plodding and sounds like a bunch of phone sounds turned into a pulsating beat which is meh. Pretty forgettable.

6. INTERLUDE (CEDRIC THE ENTERTAINER) - Refer to track one

7. RIDE WIT ME (FEAT. CITY SPUD) - Believe me, you definitely know this one. Seriously, everyone I knew was playing this track. It was sort of like the Black Plague; infectious, and you couldn't escape it. Seriously, this album pretty much succeeded on this track. Even before its release as a single in 2001, this was everywhere. The song itself; Epperson's beat is pretty decent. Epperson uses elements of DeBarge's "I Like It" to great effect, so the beat gives off a really nice night time, partying champagne vibe. Nelly's bars are probably the best in his career, mixing lyrics of just getting wasted at the club with pretty introspective personal lyrics that are vague enough to be relate-able. City Spud is pretty much ass at the end of the song, but his verse doesn't detract from the rest of the song, and catchy hook. What I'm saying is that this song is actually pretty good.

8. E.I. - Another song which pretty much helped this LP sell. In an album to promiscuity at parties, Epperson creates another beat that is pretty simplistic with electric cues, and Nelly pretty much gets to work here. I'll be honest, I don't enjoy this as much as I did circa 2001, though recalling people sing this hook (which is mangled Spanish) innocently is pretty amusing. Still, this isn't completely horrible.

9. THICKY THICK GIRL (FEAT. MURPHY LEE & ALI) - Okay, that bass sounds very familiar. It almost sounds like if our man behind the boards City Spud (I guess Jay E was too busy playing Mortal Kombat or something) sampled RBL Posse's "Listen To My Creep", which actually in turn sampled A Tribe Called Quest's "Jazz (We've Got)"; there is no sample credited, so there's a very distinct possibility that City Spud was being very naughty, and no one noticed. Or it could be my millennial ears trying to make some connection to two or three songs which are otherwise completely different. Notice how I didn't write about the song itself.

10. FOR MY (FEAT. LIL WAYNE) - Yes, that Lil Wayne. This was before Lil Wayne really blew up and didn't completely suck, but nonetheless his verse is pretty much garbage, as you could've predicted. Nelly isn't much better, and the hook here is god-awful. Seriously, this is just a fail, even by 2000 standards this was bad. No wonder this has been pretty much spending its time in the depths of hell.

11. UTHA SIDE - I actually had no idea what the hell Nelly was rapping about here. Perhaps this track was about Nelly picking up upper class white girls from the suburbs, while all participants simultaneously hold the listener at gun point and forcibly into Nelly's lowrider, with Nelly lecturing them about the serious issues of American inner cities, where said low-rider just so happened to be car-jacked, but the car jackers decided to buy Budweisers for everyone involved, because this is a pop rap song. Epperson's beat? Meh.

12. THO DEM WRAPPAS - Oh wow, this was terrible. It seems Nelly attempts to conjure up some of that gangsta shit the audience was clamoring for, over a beat that sounds like a mix between generic low-rated horror movie samples and the same electric-derived samples we've been derived from. Nelly's lyrics are pretty much unfocused, so there's no sense of unity on this song.

13. WRAP SUMDEN (FEAT. ST. LUNATICS) - The inevitable weed anthem. Well, at least Nelly and the St. Lunatics actually sound like they're high. But unfortunately this song is filled too much with the usual weed cliches that only makes you want to play Luniz and Cypress Hill instead, who were much better with this shit. I'll admit, it's amusing to hear all our participants yell out "rap song", as if this was the only rap album the listeners have heard.

14. BATTER UP (FEAT. MURPHY LEE & ALI) - The fourth, and last single, of the album. Actually, the beat, this time by Steve "Blast" Wills, is pretty fucking catchy, with the use of electric notes and bass being pretty damn effective. The lyrics on here, of course, suck, but this song enters that area where it's so corny, it's actually not that bad, because you can't take it so seriously. Nelly himself is pretty amusing with his line of "I'm eating Wheaties now!". Though I'm still wondering why they won't cook said fish in the kitchen, or burn said beans. Believe me, burned beans are bad news.

15. NEVER LET 'EM C U SWEAT (FEAT. THE TEAMSTERS) - City Spud pretty much recycles the beat to track 13, which at least wasn't awful. The Teamsters are pretty much weed carriers you won't hear about ever again; the whole song is pretty much supposed to be a generic "tough street life, do your best" track, like it hadn't been done one billion times before. 

16. LUVEN ME - The last song of the album. City Spud provides the last beat of the album, which sounds more like a G-funk beat; it pretty much uses One Way's "Don't Ever Stop Loving Me", as Warren G used in 1994, though Warren G's beat was better, but this sounds like the most distinct beat on the LP. Nelly's lyrics dedicated to his hard working mother, his (I presume) ex girlfriend whom we aren't told by name, and his merry weed carriers, are heartfelt, though very simple. Not a bad way to end proceedings.

17. OUTRO (FEAT. CEDRIC THE ENTERTAINER) - And with that, we're done with Country Grammar.  

FINAL WORD - Let's be honest, Country Grammar was never a good album to begin with, and Nelly pretty much blew up only because he happened to strike gold twice. At the best, Nelly is a competent enough rapper whose lyricism is bordering on mediocrity, but even then manages to make lightning strike. At worst, he comes off as a hack, and it's pretty easy to see why his labelmates didn't like this album too much before it was released. Nelly came in an era of one hit wonders, watered down releases, failed comebacks, and what was seen as the decline of hip hop. A lot of the album features boring cliches and monotonous lyrics, honestly we've all heard better. It's just not a good album. Even if some of the forgettable songs on here are better than the rest of the man's catalog, and hip hop in 2016.

BUY OR BURN? - You'll definitely want to burn this one. As a whole it pretty much falls apart, which is why we have the internet.

BEST TRACKS - "Ride Wit Me", "Country Grammar (Hot Shit)", "St. Louie", "Batter Up", "Luven Me"    

Too Short - Don't Stop Rappin', Players, & Raw, Uncut and X-Rated (1983-1986, 75 Girls)

Oh boy, where do we start here?

Todd Anthony Shaw, or Too Short (he couldn't call himself Too Tall, since he lost a game of craps with the Berenstains), is a West Coast emcee based out of Oakland, California, and is considered one of the legendary pioneers of the West Coast hip hop scene in general. The dude's story pretty much starts off as just making a few records out of complete boredom, which he eventually decided to sell, because you never know what will happen. Soon enough, one of the guy's songs would blow up, and it did. The man struck gold by signing a record deal with Jive (a label that played a role in killing off good hip hop, but that's another story for another day), and consequently getting a hit with Freaky Tales. Before you knew it, the dude blew up, releasing hit songs such as The Ghetto, Gettin It', and I'm a Player, before briefly retiring and then selling his soul for more airplay.

But, we're getting ahead of ourselves. We have to start somewhere, and we'll start in the 1980s, the crack epidemic, the Cold War, and rather corny movies. Short Dog was not to be faded, however, as he released 3 EPs during this time, which we will tackle all today.

Yes, three reviews in one!

DON'T STOP RAPPIN' (1983)

1. DON'T STOP RAPPIN' - And so our dive in Too $hort's career begins with a song that just infects you with a funky-as-hell bassline. Seriously, I found this catchy as hell. Short's lyricism consists of "I'm a better rapper than you", "I'm the greatest rapper of all time". and "I get so many girls". I have to admit, not hearing Shaw cuss is goofy. Seriously, this is far more funny than you'd expect. Other than that, it's pretty much what you'd expect from the 80s underground.

2. SHORTRAPP - Kind of ironic to title this song as so when it clocks in at 7:10, eh? Regardless of the rather misleading title, it's pretty much another shit-talking song. Lyrically the song is pretty much uniform with the previous song, though it's kind of funny to hear Shaw demand inferior rappers bite off him. I honestly could see this song getting remixed into a modern day pulsating European EDM hit, That's as much as I can say.

3. GIRL - Surprisingly enough, this song is not about pimping, women, and pimping women. In fact, this song is about the cocaine epidemic which was a very serious reality that was happening in urban America. Short's lyrics are actually pretty detailed, observing the epidemic quite well. Despite the good intentions and decent lyricism, this has been done before, done better, and even Too $hort himself has re-done this concept with better results.

4. FEMALE FUNK - Now we're into Playboy Short territory. With another funky beat, Too $hort describes all the sexual experiences he's had with all sorts of women, using the term "funk" as some sort of politically correct term for having sex. That's pretty much the whole song.

5. PLAYBOY SHORT - Playboy Short goes on another ego trip track. No seriously, the dude brags about things that he hadn't accomplished yet, such as limousines, packed concerts, fine women, and pet ligers. The beat here is actually quite slow and smooth; actually, if you listen carefully, this instrumental is essentially the prototype to E-40's "Player's Ball", a song that featured Too $hort himself.

And with that, we're done with with Don't Stop Rappin'. But wait, there's more!

 

By 1985, I assume Short had made a name for himself enough that the 75 Girls record label thought it was time for the world to get more of Too $hort. Of course, as we know 80s albums, we're likely to be in store for some more shit-talking, player music from Shaw, just in 1985. This time around we have Players, whether pimps or simply athletes.

1. PLAYERS - Interesting enough. The song actually starts with that famous talkbox that was pretty much epidemic in 1980s funk music, perhaps an attempt at airplay. Lyrically, it's more of the same shit-talking that we had earlier on Don't Stop Rappin'. Even the player talk here is pretty tame, and just mixed with the shit-talking. Listened to Don't Stop Rappin? While you've listened to Players too.

2. FROM HERE TO NEW YORK - We start off with another creepy-ass deep vocal, but just some deep pitch rather than the talkbox. Again, just more emcee shit talking we were exposed to earlier, although to be honest the beat is pretty funky again, so this wasn't a complete waste of time.

3. DON'T EVEN STOP - A song where Short Dog mentions dwarfism, a Beranstein Bears character, and serious relationships are all discussed. That's all I could say.

4. WILD WILD WEST - This track was interesting enough, where Short Dog compares his hometown of Oakland to the Wild West itself (never mind the fact that the real Wild West was much more safer than 80s urban America). Actually, the track is a story about emcee battles in the Wild West (I suppose). Hell, Too $hort might've even dressed up as a cowboy to get into role for this one.

5. EVERYTIME - I'll admit, the beat for this one is a little more different; the beat moves in a creepy, smooth, almost perverted way, which fits the theme of the music. Short sounds more like his 1990s-self, and raps about his signature theme - pimping. Admittedly, it still sounds weird that he doesn't cuss, so he mostly comes off as a faceless LL Cool J imitator writing his lyrics in the middle of English class. Still, this didn't completely suck.

6. DANCE (DON'T GEEK) - Pretty much just an instrumental. Not the worst music in the world, perhaps useful as elevator ambiance.

7. COKE DEALERS - In similar vain to Everytime, we get a beat that gives a creepy feel. Our hero Too $hort raps again about the crack epidemic, so for the most part this is pretty much a remake of Girl, though this feels this was made for some corny early 90s cartoon trying to project what they think is 1990s urban culture. And so ends our presentation of Players. But wait...

Oh my, we're going to get nasty here.

1. INVASION OF THE FLAT BOOTY BITCHES - For the first time, Too $hort actually cusses on a record. Too $hort mostly sounds like a 6th grader in high puberty in some strange, and I mean strange wet dream. Oh well, we have to start somewhere...

2. SHE'S A BITCH - Too $hort raps about a woman who, via government experiments, turns into a dog, and tells of the serious story of animal rights and equality. Of course not. Too $hort pretty much goes on another puberty-high sexist mumble rap. Seriously, I don't know what the hell he was going on about.

3. OAKLAND, CALIFORNIA - Short mixes rhymes about crack and pimping women at the same time. An accomplishment indeed!

4. THAT BITCH SUCKS DICK - From the Arthur episode of the same name.

5. SHORT SIDE/BLOWJOB BETTY - A song about oral sex. I think I've said enough here. And with that, we're done with Too $hort's first three EPs.

FINAL WORD: Let's be honest, none of these songs here have aged particularly well. If this was the 1980s, perhaps this stuff was changing lives, and shit. But in 2016, this is mostly just banal emcee shit talking, some serious social commentary, and inevitably, sexist pimp talking. However, every person has their humble beginnings, and Too $hort was no exception. But honestly, there really wasn't a whole lot to say here. Most of these songs had been done before (pretty much literally the last track), and were the same content.

BUY OR BURN - Neither, not as an insult. These tracks are incredibly difficult to find in physical copy, and web available versions suffer from lower quality. But if you're looking to complete some kind of Too $hort compilation of all years, the below tracks are worth it.

BEST TRACKS: "Don't Stop Rappin'", "Players", "From Here to New York" 

Warren G - Regulate... G Funk Era (1994 - Def Jam Records)

Warren Griffin III, better known as Warren G, is a rapper, producer, actor, and half-brother of Dr. Dre from Long Beach, California, best known for coining the term G funk (but not the music itself; a number of West Coast emcees had been creating the art for a while).

Warren himself was never especially gifted at rapping, generally looking rather unimpressive compared to his peers at the time, such as Snoop Dogg & Kurupt. However, his potential was enough to get him signed to Def Jam records, where he promptly struck gold with the Above the Rim soundtrack, unleashing his Regulate track to the American public, which also gave more widespread exposure to Nate Dogg. Soon enough, the man's album was announced, which you had to wonder if the dude could keep up with an entire album especially given that he wasn't the most popular out of the Death Row camp, either.

Let's get this on, shall we?

1. REGULATE (FEAT. NATE DOGG) - You all know this track; it's so pervasive that it's probably required listening in California's education curriculum. Warren G, trying to come off as the badass gangsta we know he really isn't, describes a night in the L-B-C; he gets into trouble, only for Nate Dogg to come in, kick ass and the save the day. The lyrics are so damn goofy, but the humor here manages to shine; easily a classic track.

2. DO YOU SEE - The third single released from the album. The beat here can be best described as hazy; it's almost as if Warren Jeezy himself smoked a blunt while recording this track. As such, Warren raps about his past life before he became involved in this rapping business, and such, it's a pretty good track. Also, the music video is pretty damn amusing, just for that said hazy feeling.

3. GANGSTA SERMON - ...

4. RECOGNIZE (FEAT. THE TWINZ) - I have to be honest, The Twinz lyrics are like ADHD; not much focus or chorus, and just rapping whatever the hell is on their mind. It's the obligatory weed carrier track, one while not the best look for them, ended up pretty much getting them a record deal. Warren's beat here is smooth, peaceful, and actually pretty catchy, so this track was actually all right.

5. SUPER SOUL SIS (FEAT. JAH SKILLS) - Yet another weed carrier track here; mostly a braggadocio with a similar concept to our previous track; pure randomness. I have to admit, I have a soft spot for this track, mainly because when I played this album around the early 2000s this beat would always play; same sample of "Don't Stop (Ever Loving Me)" by One Way, used by Nelly in 2000. The beat is pretty much the epitome of California, blue as the summer skies and green as a Cali park. Jah Skills is probably the worst rapper on the entire album, but has more talent than rappers today. Also, her lyrics were seemingly designed to offend, mentioning AIDS, the JFK assassination, and the Israel-Palestine conflict in one song, and with that, I've said enough about this track.

6. 94 HO DRAFT - ...

7. SO MANY SKILLS (FEAT. WAYNIAC & LADY LEVI) - I thought this song was all right - Warren Jeezy's lyrics are pretty solid and the beat was catchy enough, although I found the hook to be annoying as all hell. Also released as a single, the music video for this track is incredibly lavish as well, especially for a track meant to be in sunny Cali.

8. THIS DJ (FEAT. O.G.L.B) - I love this song. From the peaceful, synthesizer-heavy blunted beat to the introspective childhood lyrics which are meant to provoke the good days, this track just kicks ass. It's perfect for cruising around, or having a barbecue. No wonder this was a single.

9. THIS IS THE SHACK (FEAT. THE DOVE SHACK) - I never cared much for this track. That's all I can say. Also, it seems Warren G calls himself the President, after that other Warren G. Huh.

10. WHAT'S NEXT (FEAT. MR. MALIK) - The same concept as Recognize, but much more well executed. Jeezy's beat just kicks ass here, with an incredibly booming bass line that wrecks your ear drum. Both of our performers here are on par for the course, and Warren mentions those hilarious School House Rock videos which we secretly enjoyed as a kid, making you wondering what the hell you were doing back then.

11. AND YA DON'T STOP - I also love this song. Sure, Warren's bragging of being a badass gangster aren't the most credible threats, especially since the man sounds so high and friendly as hell, but once again, the man's humor shines through; the beat, using Don Julian's "Janitzio" is so damn masterful, creating the feeling of being on a Cali beach in sunset. Overall, an amazing track.

12. RUNNIN' WIT NO BREAKS - Never paid much attention to this track either, although it's quite interesting anyway; the beat here was originally made for Doggystyle, a track called The Next Episode which got canned at the very last minute, but got rehashed on here. Of course, that track would finally be delivered as promised, on 2001.

B-SIDES TO TRACK DOWN
INDO SMOKE (MISTA GRIMM FEAT. NATE DOGG & NATE DOGG) - Released a year earlier on the Poetic Justice soundtrack was one of Griffin's first recordings in the music industry, and his first crack at mainstream audience. The beat, utilizing Blowfly, is funky and catchy as all hell, and Nate Dogg's chorus kills it here. It's a mostly forgotten track though, and it doesn't help that Mista Grimm promptly fell off a cliff after this was recorded, but you'' find a great weed anthem here.

FINAL WORD: Regulate... G Funk Era is a pretty kick ass album for what it's worth. For a 90s album it's actually aged quite well over the years, and some of these tracks are just timeless. Of course, this album isn't perfect, but it's definitely a solid listen you can ride to.

BUY OR BURN? - Definitely buy this one. It's been re-released as a special 2 disc set, so this one shouldn't be too hard to find.

BEST TRACKS - "This DJ", "Regulate", "And Ya Don't Stop", "Super Soul Sis", "Do You See"

B.G. Knocc Out & Dresta - Real Brothas (Def Jam/Outburst Records - August 15, 1995)

In the early 90s, hip hop had evolved from an innocent art form that was mostly either banal emcee shit-talking or serious conscious views on urban communities in the United States dealing with drugs and street violence, to more hardcore forms dealing with gangster topics such as homicide, petty crime, police brutality, drug use, and other issues that were directly affecting inner city communities; with that came the N.W.A. I assume that a lot of you know the story; they successfully released their opus, Straight Outta Compton in 1988 to strong success, and heavy controversy. Eventually, heavy infighting between the members lead to the group being disbanded over payment.

By 1992, beef was in full swing. Dr. Dre went full on after his former record, Ruthless, and made a complete mockery of his former bandmate Eazy-E on national television via the music video for "Fuck Wit Dre Day". Of course, Eazy-E responded with his own, even more visceral diss track, "Real Muthaphuckkin G's", which featured our soup of the day, B.G. Knocc Out & Dresta, who actually did a real good job at taking down Dr. Dre in that song.

As the years passed, and the New York hip hop scene saw a revival, as well as upcoming rap scenes from many other cities taking swing at the boon of hip hop, those said merry weed carriers got a record deal of their own, however this time on Def Jam, with Def Jam looking to rebuild itself, having successfully striking gold with Warren G, and signing another West Coast stalwart in Jayo Felony as well. In 1995, in response to some serious heat from Death Row, B.G. Knocc Out and Dresta released their first (and only) album as a duo. It went on to enjoy moderate success, although gets rather forgotten in a time period (1992-1996) which brought us some really, and I mean really, good albums. Is this underratedness justified, though? Let's find out.

1. EVERYDAY ALL DAY - Our voyage into the magnum opus known as Real Brothas starts off with Everyday All Day, a statement track which states the goals of our hosts. Our hosts waste no time when starting off; there are a number of disses towards the Death Row camp, and warnings about trying to step up to BG and Dresta. Our beat, curtosey of Madness 4 Real and Dr Jam, is fast paced, with the boogie elements used very well to create a catchy, knocking and energetic beat. Dresta's flow is very clean throughout, and absolutely rips shit throughout. Not a bad way to start off, not at all.

2. JEALOUSY (FEAT. MO) - BG and Dresta this time around rap about how their own homies seemingly can't respect what they've earned, and how every man, woman, and child on every corner turns into an enemy, hellbent on stealing our hosts wealth. Madness 4 Real and Doctor Jam collaborate again, this time for a synthesizer and bass heavy beat, which isn't anything too special or original, but for what it's worth, it's pretty good. Our hosts again are on point, and are able to ride out the beat throughout, and stay on point.

3. WHOSE THE G - This time around we have a BG-only track; I assume Dresta was stuck in the infamous SoCal traffic on his way to work, and therefore couldn't appear. Vic C goes behind the board this time, and the instrumental here again kicks fucking ass; the synth used just creeps through your ears, and sticks with you even after you're done, haunting you in your nightmares. Dresta's braggadocio of being the master gangster throughout the Compton hoods is straight through. Yet another strong track.

4. COMPTON SWANGING (FEAT. LA TEE) - I hate this track with a fiery passion. It's another track that blatantly and shamelessly jacks Kool and the Gang's "Hollywood Swinging", and honestly, I've never seen ANY song able to use this sample well; not Too $hort, not Mack 10, not anyone. It's just one of those songs that honestly can't really be sampled without being too obvious. Oh well, they can't all be winners.

5. LIFE'S A PUZZLE (FEAT. L.V. & LA TEE) - Our hosts step back from the usual Compton gang-banging and create a track that was probably an attempt to garner widespread airplay. Charlie B's beat is soft, and it sort of sounds like generic G-funk piffle. Our hosts rap about the enduring puzzles of life, and how unfairly, and cruelly, bad it gets, presumably something to do with the number 42. Overall, I thought this track was all right, but nothing incredibly special.

6. B.G. KNOCC OUT - Charlie B is behind the boards again and delivers a syntesizer-heavy beat; our proceedings here are predictably a tribute to B.G. K-O, a tribute that comes off as mostly meh. The lyrics honestly aren't anything I haven't heard, and I've heard better beats.

7. Compton Hoe - A song dedicated to prostitutes, swingers, sex parties, and men who whore themselves in order to get laid. No seriously, listen carefully to Dresta's first verse; hell, even in the second-verse, he calls himself a "bonafide hoe", so maybe this song is Dresta's aspiration to become like Casanova. BG Knocc Out is cockblocked to the chorus from this massive orgy, which samples The Honey Drippers' "Impeach the President", like that hasn't been done a million times before, though our beat lacks any sort of chipmunk; mind you, it's not a bad beat, either. Overall, a decent song.

8. Micc Checc - Madness 4 Real and Doctor Jam deliver another beat, one that is a pretty minimalist effort, with original guitar and bass done by Mike "Crazy Neck" Sims; as minimal as it is, it creates a strong earworm, a beat that just slowly builds in your mind with creepiness and grimness. Our hosts here talk about revenge killings in the CPT, in which Dresta takes time to talk about his deceased brother as well. Overall, another solid effort.

9. Compton & Watts - A Rhythum D production here; Dresta here actually take time to call out the phonies in their neighborhood, as well as claiming fake rep, presumably Dr. Dre and Snoop Doggy Dogg, although no one is ever called out by name. I assume BG was on his lunch break at Del Taco, and Dresta's 15 minutes of fame are pretty short anyway, without a whole lot of substance either way. Not awful, but not memorable.

10. 50/50 Luv - Another Rhythum D production which is actually quite smooth and clean. Our hosts rap about nostalgic days before gang violence became epidemic as it did, as well as reminiscing about simpler days without violence or gang rivalries. Our guests' verses actually manage to stay on point, and unlike many songs of this type, it actually keeps an organic Compton sound without appeasing to a wider audience. A great track, and understandably why this was released as the first single off the album.

11. Real Brothas - Fucking awesome. That's all. Wait, I have to write about the song? Let's start with the beat; Rhythum D drops another bomb here, which just infects your brain with the funk. The synthesizer is just so damn catchy that you just can't help but move to it. Both of our hosts deliver a hell of an emotional performance; rapping from deep feelings about the struggle to their hopes to become a successful rap duo. Hands down, this is the best song of the entire album. Why this wasn't released as a single is beyond me.

12. Do or Die - Charlie B is behind the boards again; even though he was responsible for the 3 weaker tracks on here, he redeems himself nicely again with a very tragic-sounding synthesizer heavy beat that just puts you into the South Central hoods at sunset. This time it's a BG Knocc Out solo, with Dresta relegated to the hook; Dresta tells a pretty entertaining story about keeping things under control in the hood, which eventually turns into a hit; a very solid track.

13. Take a Ride - Rhythum D is behind the boards again, and producers another funky hood banger; our hosts, likely done with the delirium of hood life featuring homicides, car jackings, studio gangstas and bad traffic, create a track that was instead meant to be banged at a house party, or for that song you play on your way to the prom in order to look cool. For what's it worth, it's pretty damn good as well.

14. Down Goes Another Nigga - Another Rhythum D beat, although honestly compared to his earlier beats this one really isn't as memorable; it feels as if this was created for some Halloween gangsta album that was canned but got rehashed on here. Honestly though, I wasn't really sure what our hosts were rapping about; perhaps our heroes are rapping about a succubus that got loose and killed their homies, and their attempts to eradicate it from their local Compton neighborhood.

15. D.P.G./K - We reach our closer, which was actually the last single released from the album. Our hosts get off some pretty rhymes off, calling out the entire Death Row roster, and accussing them of being phonies, liars, and cheats. Madness 4 Real and Doctor Jam again give us a beat, and a pretty hot track. Also, the music video for this track was hysterical. A good way to strike back against the Death Row camp (a beef that would eventually end up being moot), and a good way to close out our album, and with that, we are done with Real Brothas.

SUMMARY: Real Brothas is straight-up, no frills, authentic, gangsta rap and G-funk. Both Dresta and BG Knocc Out sound solid, crisp, and on-point throughout our whole proceedings; topic wise the album doesn't really have one clear direction; a few songs are about typical gangster rap with your usual hardcore lyrics about the thug life, guns, killings and sets, a few other songs have a softer, mellow approach, and a few aren't really meant to be taken too seriously at all. That's not to detract from the album; even with the various topics at hand, the album is actually a pretty consistent lyrics, thanks to some really kick ass producers behind the board, and actually quite impressive lyricism from our hosts. Even in 2016, this album is still quite an enjoyable listen, and is definitely a West Coast gem.

BUY OR BURN?: Is this even serious? Definitely buy this album! This is probably one of the best releases of 1995, and is constantly criminally underrated. A must-have for any hip hop head. Sadly, this album has almost gone out of print and brand new ones are incredibly expensive, although a quick iTunes purchase is convenient.

BEST TRACKS: "Real Brothas", "Do or Die", "Everyday Allday", "50/50 Luv", "Whose the 'G", "Jealousy"

RBL Posse - A Lesson To Be Learned (In-a-Minute Records, September 16, 1992)

So where do I start here...

The RBL Posse (short for Ruthless By Law; perhaps they declared anarchy) is a relatively underground gangsta rap group hailing from Hunter's Point, San Francisco, and are perhaps maybe the best known rappers from San Francisco, formed by Christian Matthews (Black C), and Kyle Church (Mr. Cee). Ricky Herd (Hitman) would not join until a later date in 1995, therefore fully creating the Three Amigos.

For a while from 1992 until 1995, RBL Posse were making quite a name for themselves in the West Coast; they were not nearly as well known as other famous West Coast stalwarts such as Ice Cube, the rookie of the year at the time Snoop Dogg, or famous worldwide player and ass-shaker Too $hort. However, indie sales regionally were quite impressive, enough to get a deal on Atlantic Records. The RBL Posse had a very distinct sound; it was dark and grimey, yet very distinctly West Coast. It seemed as if the RBL Posse were destined for a blow up nationwide. Unfortunately, this good will would not last long.

On New Year's Day 1996, Mr. Cee was murdered near his home in San Francisco, in an apparent gang beef. Throughout the 1990s and the early 2000s Hunter's Point, San Francisco would be plagued by a number of gang wars and retaliation murders; eventually this reached a boiling point with Hitman being murdered in 2003, leaving only Black C as the survivng member of the RBL Posse; to this day, Black C continues the legacy of the brand, still making solo projects, as well as some weed carrier projects.

I'll go on with the RBL Posse as I progress with their discography; first, let's tackle A Lesson to Be Learned, a gangsta rap album released just before the dawn of Dr. Dre's The Chronic.

1. INTRO (FEAT. HERM LEWIS) - To start off our proceedings, we are hit with a conscious message from apparent SF community leader Herm Lewis, with a "warning" of not letting the album influence one's actions, an apparent retort of N.W.A.'s earlier messages about gangsta rap. I usually wouldn't right so much about an intro, but this feels so unfortunately ironic and out-of place; I'd listen to a preachy album if I needed to. Anyway...

2. I AIN'T NO JOKE - Starts off with a Beastie Boys sample, interestingly enough. The actual beat is pretty simple, primarily utilizing a 80s funk sampled bass, which is pretty catchy, although admittedly sounds slightly dated. Our verses, rapping about the dangers of Hunter's Point and the RBL Posse's rep, are effective enough, if not pedestrian. Overall, a pretty solid way to begin the album.

3. MORE LIKE AN ORGY - As it was a 1990s West Coast album, of course we have a sex rap. At the very least, this is a good sex rap. Black C's beat, again infused with 80s funk bass, as well as a few vocal samples, is catchy as all hell, and you just want to move to it. Lyrically, the Posse is quite descriptive and vivid with an apparent late night party, which the goal of getting sweet, black pussy. In all seriousness, this was a fun listen.

4. DON'T GIVE ME NO BAMMER WEED - The first single off the album, peaking at #16 in the Hot Rap Singles chart. An ode to quality marijuana, Black C and Mr. Cee call out those that fail in giving out good joints, as well as the beautiful effects of cannabis, thus encouraging the use and sharing of quality marijuana throughout the populace. The beat is just smooth as all hell, yet so cheery and peaceful, as if the beat itself was smoking whatever Black C and Mr. Cee brought to work that day. The chorous is goofy as hell, but that's the point. 24 years later it still holds strong.

5. BITCHES ON THE DING DONG - The beat here begins with a drum kick, which kind of reminds me of Havoc's production circa 1993-2000, which would begin with that signature drum kick. But that's the best that can be said here; the beat isn't nearly as catchy as our previous 3 beats, and sort of feels a bit like a mess. The lyrics are mostly just a generic sex rap. Unlike More Like an Orgy, this feels rather forced, and incredibly corny, thus, our first true dud of the album. Also, I wonder if Hostess ever heard this song before.

6. A LESSON TO BE LEARNED - As a general rule, title tracks usually suck, and I'm not a fan of this one; the beat basically follows the trend that Ice Cube started in 1990 of directly jacking beats for songs, so this feels rather unoriginal. Lyrically, the Posse sounds all right; the song is mostly a diss track towards the SFPD, and calling them out for police brutality (which was just as bad of an issue back then, as it is now), and a warning to them about dealing with Hunter's Point's denizens. If this song were over an actual original beat, I probably would've liked this more, but this song feels pretty average.

7. G'S BY THE 1,2,3'S (FEAT. TOTALLY INSANE) - The obligatory weed carrier track; to their credit, Totally Insane (a name I probably won't be writing about too much) manage to hold their own with the rest of the Posse. Yet again we get a pretty simple, yet actually quite smooth and catchy beat. Lyrically, our performers aren't amazing, rapping about living the thug life in the SFC; howver, overall this is another pretty solid track.

8. REMIND ME - Another West Coast track that basically jacks Patrice Rushen's Remind Me, the Posse this time raps about being able to pick up so many girls based on the popularity of the music. While this song isn't the worse, this concept has been done before, and it's been done better. Like with A Lesson to Be Learned, the song follows the Ice Cube created trend of using 2 beats in one song; also, the term "Captain Save a Hoe" seems to have been used here before E-40 made an entire song about that concept, a song that blew up on the entire West Coast and lead to the term being popularized in general.

9. SORTA LIKE A PSYCHO - Both Black C and Mr. Cee vent their frustrations about life and society, and how much they want to go Grand Theft Auto on civilization, and their anger at the system; the song turns into a simple vent into a bit of a story, where our heroes end up shooting civilians out of rage, which is actually pretty seamless. Again, the beat, while simple, is pretty smooth and catchy, so this was an enjoyable listen.

10. A PART OF SURVIVAL - The Posse deliver a pretty serious song about how crime is seriously affecting their community; our hosts deliver some pretty vivid lyrics about what life is like in the Hunter's Point, and how the struggle is seriously affecting them and their community. The beat is a bit too happy and bouncy for the serious and dark subject matter, but it manages to kick ass anyway.

11. OUTRO - An outro dedicated to friends, family members, and those that helped with the creation of the album. And with that, we are done.

SUMMARY: For an underground gangsta rap album that actually did quite well for itself regionally, RBL Posse's A Lesson to Be Learned is actually pretty good, and is a nice West Coast gem. The beats sadly sound a bit dated, and lyrically RBL Posse aren't Geoffrey Chaucer. However, a lot of these tracks actually have a lot of charm to them, which shines through.

BUY OR BURN: You should definitely buy this. While this album is out of print and quite rare, you can find this on iTunes, and you can support the RBL Posse itself through their official website.

BEST TRACKS: "Don't Give Me No Bammer Weed", "More Like an Orgy", "Sorta Like a Psycho", "G's by the 1, 2, 3's"